Get the Real Church Key and Have Some Class!!

Now we have all had the issue from time to time where we realized that our ice cold beer was not a screw top but in actuality, a pop top.  This I am sure happened to a lot of New Orleans Modern Drunkards in April of 2009 when the Abita Brewery Changed from their easy to open screw tops to the PRY-OFF CROWN, which they declared would "ensure that discerning Abita Beer drinkers will taste the full range of flavor in every bottle" as they declared a War on Oxygen!! (Press Release: NEW PRY-OFF CROWN KEEPS ABITA BEER FRESHER)

Now there are countless horrible methods to deal with the problem at hand. 

We have all seen the intense cigarrette smoker offering his services in exchange for the freedom to smoke around his friends.  To justify his habit, you watch him struggling for hours with a lighter.  This can take precious time from our beverage drinking, not to mention can ruin a perfectly good cheap piece of crap lighter and prevent our hero from smoking packs of menthol all over your crawfish boil.

 Then there is always that goofy looking college prep who is the perfect doppelganger of Jeff Spicoli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High.  This knucklehead is more than happy to assist in opening your frosty light mexican beer with his flip flops.  As he takes the section of the bottle where you are about to put your mouth, he lackadaisically hooks it in right next to the wad of gum and fragrant residue of Bourbon street that he collected earlier.  Ironically this is the same guy who won't eat any foods tainted with chemicals yet he pollutes our beer with scum of the streets.  Our Saviour!! 

And then there is always your Teeth??  Although there may be something truly animalistic and savage about this method...the New Orleans Modern Drunkards strongly recommends that you DO NOT open bottles with your teeth! You will chip your teeth! Many molars have been  rounded off from being chipped by beer caps.

Not to mention, many a dumbass friend went to open a beer with his teeth and ended up swallowing the bottle cap and having to be rushed to the emergency room. So you don't end up with a $2,800 medical bill for being an idiot.

So how does a New Orleans Modern Drunkard handle this situation?  Well, we finally got the keys to the church.  That's right, SuckUK has made a beautiful Church Key Bottle Opener that not only takes care of the situation of a freeing your frosty beverage, but does it in a safe, socially acceptible, and classic method..

According to SuckUK, the Church Key Bottle Opener is the coolest bottle opener you could hang from your key chain! Made from tough nickel steel. This key shape bottle opener will impress and bemuse everywhere you go. Ships in an attractive gift pack. The key measures approximately 3 in x 1 in.

So how do you obtain the Church Key Bottle Opener from SuckUK, well you have two options:

1) You can pick up one here

2) You can conveniently get one for $10.00 + tax at 2026 Magazine Street at locally owned & operated Aidan Gill For Men. 

Remember, friends don't let friends open beer in a douchbag manner! 

So do you have one of these great skeleton key bottle openers?  What do you think about it?  Leave us comments below on this or other ways you open your favorite beer!!

Fun with Jack Daniels

"Basically I am for anything that gets you through the night - be it Prayer, Tranquilizers, or a bottle of Jack Daniels" ~Frank Sinatra

FUN FACTS ABOUT JACK DANIELS

• In 1904, Jack Daniels' "Old No. 7" was one of 20 Whiskeys from around the world to compete in a contest at the Worlds Fair. It won the Gold Medal as the "World's Best Whiskey"!!


• When Visiting the Jack Daniels distillery, enjoy the aromas because that is as close as you will get to any whiskey. You can't sample any whiskey nor buy any. Why? Well, Lynchburg, Tennessee where the Distillery lies, is a dry county.


• The First batches of Jack Daniels were sold in large ceramic jugs with big XXs printed on the side


• The old wives tale that if you drink too much Jack Daniels you will go blind has been disproven. The only way to go blind is to break the bottle and Jab it into your face.


• Historically Jack Daniels was registered at 90 Proof (45% by Volume) but in 2004, they lowered the proof to 80 (40%by Volume) proving once again that the terrorists had won!!

Try a Hot Chocolate Toddy: the Happy Holidaze

There are many different toddys out there from your basic Hot Toddy to the ever popular Hot Buttered Rum. Then there are many excellent Hot Coffee Cocktails, including the famous Cafe' Brulot Diabolique which is an Antoine's creation of hot spiced coffee set aflame with brandy at your table. So when the New Orleans Modern Drunkards came accross a recipe for a Hot Chocolate Toddy....we knew a tasting was in order.


The recipe is that of the Happy Holidaze, a concoction developed by Abigail Gullo a bartender at Fort Defiance in Red Hook, Brooklyn, New York. In Abigail's interview with the New York Times, it was said that this drink was "designed to warm the pipes and buoy the nerves" in order to help Christmas singers announce bodly the coming of Jesus!!

So with that description and the idea of a Hot Chocolate cocktail, who were we to turn down this cocktail testing.


The Happy Holidaze
Makes 1 serving

Ingredients:

- 1 cup of Hot Chocolate

- 3/4 oz of Green Chartreuse

- 3/4 oz of Cointreu

- Marshmellows or Whipped Cream***

Preperation:

Add Chartreuse & Cointreau to Hot Chocolate, stir & serve in mug.

Now we give you honest feedbacks and we made several batches. It was an interesting cocktail that definately warmed up our cockles. The Chartreuse often gave us the impression that parts of our Christmas tree had fell into our Hot Chocolate which I suppose was the purpose. It was noted that several people did have the urge to sing from the tingle the Chartreuse gave us. One person also recommended that adding Whipped Cream or Marshmellows would prove we love Jesus.

So try it out and tell us what you think. Have a fun variation on this Hot Chocolate cocktail that you think people will enjoy? Leave a comment below.

***Whipped Cream or Marshmellows are OPTIONAL. The New Orleans Modern Drunkards can not confirm nor deny that Marshmellows nor Whipped Cream will add to this cocktail's flavor nor can we confirm nor deny that it will prove that you love Jesus.

Beer Warning: Beer contains Female Hormones!!

Alert to all Men Everywhere!! Alert to all Men Everywhere!!!

Last Month, Montreal University & Canadian Scientists released the results of a recent analysis conducted in their labs. This analysis revealed the prescence of a female hormone in beer that can have adverse & potentially harmful affects on men. A theory, derived from their head researcher, is that beer contains female hormones due to hops. Hops contains phytoestrogens! The researcher went on to declare that by drinking enough Beer, men can potentially turn into women!!


To test the theory, the Research team of scientists developed a Randomized, Drunken Blind, location study of 100 males. Each male was told to consume 8 schooners of beer within a 1 hour period of time, followed by a 10 minute pee break, before observation.



It was observed that adverse affects occurred in 100% of the male participants. THAT'S RIGHT!! 100% of Men were affected by the female hormones!!

The Results were as follows in 100% of the Males:


1) Argued over absolutely nothing
2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong
3) Gained weight
4) Talked excessively without making any sense at all
5) Became overly emotional
6) Couldn't Drive
7) Failed to think Rationally
8) Had to pee sitting down

The Researchers felt that No Futher Testing was considered Necessary!

New Orleans Bar Guide

Need to grab a drink in New Orleans but don't know exactly where to go? Then this easy to follow flow chart can definately offer you a funny idea of where to obtain your next libation. So tonight, rather than going to the same old same old, follow this handy yet insane guide and let us know where you ended up. Leave a comment below and tell us where you went.

The Pisco Sour

A Pisco Sour is a cocktail containing pisco, lemon or lime juice, egg whites, simple syrup, and Angostura bitters. An account is that the Pisco Sour cocktail is a variation of the Whiskey sour, invented in the early 1920s by American expatriate Victor V. "Gringo" Morris at the Morris' Bar in Lima, Peru. The cocktail quickly became a favorite of locals. Soon many of the grand Lima hotels at that time such as the Maury and the Hotel Bolivar began serving pisco sours to their international guests, helping the drink become an international hit. An old advertisement of Pisco Sour was published in 1924 by the Morris' Bar of Lima.
In Peru, Pisco Sour day is celebrated on the first Saturday of February. When the Peruvian National Anthem is played all Pisco Sours must be finished as a mark of respect.

Here in New Orleans, the Pisco Sour is often found as a summer drink at some of the finer cocktail establishmenst like Carousel bar. In fact, according to the recent issue of Mutineer Magazine, the Pisco Sour is the #1 selling cocktail sold at the famous Carousel bar in the past year. So go out and taste it or make if off the recipe below.

Pisco Sour Makes 1 serving

Ingredients: ~ 1 1/2oz of Pisco

~ 1 oz of Simple Sugar

~ 1 oz of Fresh Lime Juice or less

~ 1 1/2 oz of Egg Whites or 1 Whole Egg White

~ Dash of Angostura Bitters

In a shaker, mix 3 ice cubes, pisco, simple sugar, fresh lime juice, and egg whites. Shake until mixture is nice and frothy and serve straight up in a martini glass with a dash of aromatic bitters.

It took us about 3 attempts to mix it right cause too much bitters made it taste funny and we STRONGLY recommed that you DONT use Roses Lime. A dash of lime juice or 1 oz of fresh squeezed like juice goes a long way although we liked it with only splashes of lime juice. After that, it was all a good time and a great cocktail

New Orleans Saints Hip Flask

We are back!! After a nice 2 week hiatus, the New Orleans Modern Drunkards are back in time for all the great celebrations to come...and not a moment too soon because:

WE FINALLY MADE IT!!! That is right, the NEW ORLEANS SAINTS are going to the Superbowl!!! New Orleans Modern Drunkards have been toasting and celebrating this momentous occasion with great fervor and will continue to for the next two weeks!

With such a great win, how are we showing our team support, well some of us are wearing Saints Apparel while drinking cocktails and some of us are carrying round these cool New Orleans Saints Stainless Steel Hip Flask.

So do people still carry hip flasks anymore? Of course they do!! It's a great way to smuggle your favorite hooch into events and mix it with your favorite juice or soda without having to carry round mini glass bottles wherever you go!

Hip flasks have been around since the 18th and early 19th century, especially when Prohibition was really restricting people from enjoying their favorite libations. They were a way for those alcohol loving rebels to enjoy their favorite sauce discreetly and without Johnny Law coming down on them.

Now a days, especially in New Orleans, we don't have to worry about prohibition or even an open container law. Thus the flask is used more to imply style and social status than anything else and sometimes just a matter of convenience.

Obviously, one of our favorite flasks is the New Orleans Saints Stainless Steel Hip Flask. It's a great way to keep your New Orleans Saints pride close to your hip with the New Orleans Saints Stainless Steel Hip Flask. We like it also because it holds 6oz of our favorite potent liquids. It makes a great gift for the any New Orleans Saints fan. Check it out or buy one today.

Sauce Spotlight: Creole Shrub

So it's Saturday and we don't have college football to look forward to til the fall. What are we going to do? Well perhaps we can interest you in trying a wonderful Orange Liqueur. For our Saturday Sauce Spotlight, we would like to present Rhum Clement Creole Shrub.

Now with any bar, it is essential to have an Orange Liqueur. Orange liqueur is a great nightcap that can be sipped Neat for that warm sensation on those cold nights or Straight Up to end a day with a relaxing, chilled, flavorful nip. It is also a neccessary ingredient in most drinks like Margaritas, the 57 Chevy, any "Blue" cocktail like a Blue Hawaiin, or Cosmos amoung others. So why not stick to the common Triple Sec, Blue Curacao, Cointreau, or Grand Marnier? Well, you can but Rhum Clement Creole Shrub offers a whole new level of flavor that is unmatched by the others.

As New Orleans Modern Drunkards, we are already fans of Creole Seasonings and Spices that are common place in our great food here in New Orleans. Rhum Clement follows along with the idea of adding great creole spices and bitter orange peels to their Sugar Cane based Rhum made on the Carribbean Island of Martinique. (Rhum is the term used for rums from French-speaking locales).

While drinking it Neat in a small snifter, as we prefer it, you will first notice it's Golden Orange color and thick body that coats a glass like warm honey. It's bouquet is a dark orange fragrance with hints of peppery spices that will surely clear out any sinus issues that you maybe experiencing. However, despite the wonderful Creole aroma, it's taste is remarkably smooth with a creamy orange finish that is far better than the common and popular Grand Marnier or Cointreau finish.

We recommend that you lightly sip it if served neat cause the tasting offers a wonderful warming sensation as it rolls down into your belly. You can also add it to your favorite cocktail recipes as a replacement for any Triple Sec or Cointreau like orange Liqueur. Rhum Clement has a fun Variation on the Kir Royal where you mix Champagne with Creole Shrub that we think would be a fun party drink with some bite!

It comes in several varieties: Regular, VSOP, a Premier Cane, Homere', and their X.O. In general, you can find their Regular Creole Shrub and most cocktail bars and restaurants and we highly recommend that you add it to your home bar.

So have you ever tried Creole Shrub? What do you think about it? Do you have a favorite cocktail that you use Creole Shrub in? Let us know what you think by adding a comment below.

Thirsty Thursday: Hot Buttered Rum

Well, it's officially carnival time here in New Orleans & I hope you New Orleans Modern Drunkards have been getting prepared for the Mardi Gras. In dealing with this really cold winter season, we are sharing with you guys a wonderful recipe for Hot Buttered Rum. I think many people have mixed feelings on this cocktail only due to the fact that it is often made so badly in so many places. This is usually due to lack of prep time. We find that if you put in a little time to make up the "Buttery Batter" ahead of time, you won't be drinking really crappy, watery, oily, rum. Therefore, we hope you enjoy this recipe below that we personally like.



Ingredients:

1 stick unsalted butter, softened
2 cups light brown sugar
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon grated nutmeg
Pinch ground cloves
Pinch salt
Bottle dark rum
Boiling water



Preparation:

In a bowl, cream together the butter, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves, and salt. Refrigerate until almost firm. Spoon about 2 tablespoons of the butter mixture into 12 small mugs. Pour about 3 ounces of rum into each mug (filling about halfway). Top with boiling water (to fill the remaining half), stir well, and serve immediately. This recipe should yield about 10 servings.

Try it out and let us know what you think!! Have a different variation that you prefer, let us know by leaving a comment.

Top 5 Tuesday - Week of 1-05-10

Well New Orleans Modern Drunkards, it is the first week of 2010 and we some of us are wondering what is going on now that the Saints have a bye week and there are no New Years Eve and Sugar Bowl festivities. Well don't Fret!! This week has some interesting events that will intrigue and entertain you all while enjoying some great libations.

So during the Week of 1/05/10 - 1/11/10 this is our Tuesday Top 5:

#5) Beth Patterson is playing at Yo Mama's Bar & Grill on at 727 St. Peters St at 8:00pm on Tuesday, January 5th

#4) Necro Hippies are playing for the Louisiana "Books 2 Prisoners" Benefit at the Allways Lounge on 2240 St. Claude Ave at 10pm on Saturday, January 9th

#3) Clockwork Elvis is playing for "Elvis' 75th Birthday Party" at Rock 'N' Bowl at 3000 S. Carrollton Ave at 9pm on Friday, January 8th

#2) Times Picayune Columnist Chris Rose will be performing his "A**HOLE Monologues" at the Hi-Ho Lounge at 2239 St. Claude Ave at 8pm & 10pm on Saturday, January 9th

and for our #1 this week....

#1) Anthony Bourdain is coming to the Mahalia Jackson Theater at 801 N. Rampart St. at 7:30pm on Thursday, January 7th

Anthony Bourdain will be coming to New Orleans again but this time, he isn't here for his "No Reservations" tv show. Rather, he is here as part of the inaugural year of the New Orleans' Speaker Series. Dubbed the cooking world's "Bad Boy", he will be here for one night only. Of course he will be promoting his show and his best selling books: Anthony Bourdain's Les Halles Cookbook: Strategies, Recipes, and Techniques of Classic Bistro Cooking & Kitchen Confidential Updated Ed: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly (P.S.). But also while here he will be talking about his adventures in food, cocktails, cooking, and of course his amazing travels.

The Tickets for this One Night Only Show are around $38 - $60 and there is a a special VIP Ticket that comes with a Meet & Greet with Mr. Bourdain that is $125.

After his show, expect the urge to smoke crumpled up cigarettes & drinking high octane cocktails at your favorite dive bar.

So do you have or no a better event this week? Post it up in the comments of the website.

Sauce Spotlight: Space Beer

Well we already have space ice cream and space orange juice or tang, so it was only a matter of time before we have were going to "SPACE BEER"! Ok so it not really beer made in space but it's the first step toward Cosmic Cocktails!

Leave it up to those crazy russian cosmonauts to spend time growing barely instead of more important scientific research aboard the International Space Station. Actually, according to Sapporo, the space-barley research was done for “the purpose of achieving self-sufficiency in food in the space environment.” They also grew other vegetables like wheat, lettuce, and peas. In a collaborative effort between the Russian Academy of Science, Okayama University in Japan and Sapporo Breweries, barley was grown for the first time in a Russian laboratory on board the International Space Station during the 5 month mission. Then the Sapporo Breweries, one of Japan's major breweries, went on to use the crop of barley grown in space to create 100 litres of a 5.5 per cent proof beer ­aptly named Space Barley.

According to Junichi Ichikawa, managing directory for strategy at Sapporo Breweries, "There's really no beer like it because it uses 100 per cent barley. Our top seller is the Black Label brand, using additional ingredients such as rice. This one doesn't, and is really a special beer." According to the brewmasters, The beer features a mellow fragrance with a distinctive taste of roasted barley. It doesn't really have any special taste differences since according to analysis of the DNA from the barley grown on the ISS showed no difference from plants grown right here on Earth.

“This beer will be sold for charity, to contribute to the promotion of science education for children and the development of space science research in Japan and Russia, through donation of all proceeds to Okayama University,” Sapporo stated in a press release Dec. 3. The very limited results, just 250 precious six-packs, will be sold through a lottery for 10,000 yen or $115 American which makes it about $19-a-bottle.

So how about the hops? Don’t worry, those were launched into space in August. Now if we can only catch those damn, "PIGS IN SPACE!!" then we can have ourselves a great Galaxy BBQ. Can't wait to taste that stuff!

What do you think about Space Beer?

Where're We Wednesday? 12/30/09

Well it's the Wednesday before New Year's Day and I hope that all of our New Orleans Modern Drunkards are going to celebrate with family, friends, and cocktails. So in light of this major party and the other events going on in our great city like the Sugar Bowl, we are not going to have an "official" Where are We Wednesday. However, that doesn't mean that the New Orleans Modern Drunkards aren't going out tonight, Wednesday December 30th at 7pm.

The first two people to find Eric the New Orleans Modern Drunkard will get a drink on him.

So to figure out where we will be here are your 5 clues:
1) This place is known for its daily happy hour margarita and drink specials from 3:30 p.m. to 6:30 p.m

2) This place has more than 60 available tequilas to enjoy

3) Not only can you access this place by street car at stop#21 but you can also view one of the beautiful "A Streetcar Named Inspire " statues in front

4) You can also find this place not only in New Orleans but also in Baton Rouge, Shreveport, & Birmingham

5) If you can figure out the Saintly Street this place is on, the address in Roman Numerals is MMMDCXXXVI

So hope to see you guys out there. Have a great day and a Happy New Year!!!

Top 5 Tuesday - Week of 12-29-09

Happy New Years New Orleans Modern Drunkards. It's our Top 5 Tuesday and this week is obviously packed with parties, drinking, and events. So we are going to share what we feel are the top 5 events this week. Now there are plenty of private parties but why pay a hundred dollars or more for a stuffy bar in the french quarter that you can go to on friday for free.

So during the Week of Christmas 12/29/09 - 1/04/10 this is our Tuesday Top 5:

#5) Rebecca Barry is coming in from Mobile to play her sax and sing at Dos Jefes Uptown Cigar Bar at 10pm on Friday, January 1st.

#4) Johnny J and the Hitmen will be playing at Clever Wine Bar from 7pm - 10pm on New Years Eve, Thursday, December 31st at the Pre-Bonfire Bash in Mid-city & it's FREE!!

#3) A Champagne Tasting & Benefit for the Louisiana Cystic Fibrosis Foundation called Uncork the Cure, will be happening at the Republic New Orleans. The $40 admission will cover samples of Champagne and Sparkling Wine from Republilc National and food from some of the city's favorite restaurants all while you help a great charity. The event is from 8pm - 11pm on Tuesday, December 29th.

#2) Fast Times New Year’s Eve Prom will be going on at One Eyed Jack's starting at 9pm on New Years Eve, December 31st with only a $10 entry for ages 21+ and $15 for ages 18-21. Come and Toast the new year with the champagne of beers: $1 Miller High Life.

and for our #1....

#1) Better Than Ezra will be playing Live at the House of Blues New Orleans starting at 8pm on Wednesday, December 30th.

Better Than Ezra is one of Louisiana's own favorite bands & these boys can rock. Therefore, we recommend them playing Live at the House of Blues New Orleans as our #1 pick of the week. Many of us may own Better Than Ezra Music but no recording can entirely capture the "live show" experience that they offer. They will also play another show on New Year's Eve, although this concert maybe more expensive since they are offering an open bar. However, an open bar at the house of blues maybe a bit to crowded and tiresome for our desires.


So do you have or no a better event this week? Post it up in the comments of the website.